Spring has sprung and who needs a beautiful, lush yard, right? Here we are providing you with the best ways guaranteed to destroy your lawn and become the eyesore of the neighborhood.
Scalping
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Scalping your cool-season grass lawn is an excellent way to ensure its ultimate demise and to develop a barren wasteland around your home. The word itself brings to mind pretty graphic ideas, but scalping your lawn is setting your lawn mower blades on a setting too close to the soil. Scalping your lawn is an excellent way to prevent root growth and thriving grass. Pro tip: the best way to scalp your lawn is to make sure you don’t pay any attention to uneven parts in your lawn and hack away on the lowest possible setting!
Dull Lawn Mower Blades
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Want another way to help kill your lawn? Dull blades tear into your grass rather than cutting it cleanly. To ensure maximum damage, never sharpen or replace your lawn mower blades and keep the originals on forever. This will result in those jagged cuts and discolorations that you are aiming for in your lawn!
Amount of Watering
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A third, and excellent, way to ensure the destruction of your lawn is to always under or over water it. Underwatering is easy! Either never water your lawn and watch as it becomes dry and straw-like or make sure you only water it during the heat of the day so the water evaporates faster than your lawn can absorb it. The hard, brown grass will surely be the envy of all your neighbors!
As for overwatering? Another simple trick! Find your grass thirsty? Definitely water it as long as possible and wait until you have pooling in your lawn before turning off that hose! Drowning your grass is another excellent way to ensure its demise. Don’t have the time to water it for a long time all at once? That is fine, too! Consider watering it thoroughly multiple times a day to achieve the same results.
Thatch
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Associated with mowing the lawn, a large buildup of thatch left on top of your lawn and not raked off is yet another excellent way to kill your lawn. Consider walking all across your lawn and really compacting it on top of your healthy grass to choke it out. This compaction will prevent water and air circulation as well as stop any fertilizer from reaching the roots. After all, you do want that brown, lifeless yard, right?
No Need to Stop Weeds-Let the Crabgrass Flourish!
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Considering the weeds? It is springtime and they are coming! A great way to destroy your lawn is to let the crabgrass flourish. No need to put an end to those beautiful, lawn-destroying weeds! If you are going to use weed killer, make sure you pay no attention to if your chosen spray will be compatible with your grass type or to the amount of dilution it should have. Is your lawn already brown? Well it can’t hurt then, can it? Definitely apply more weed killer to a brown lawn.
Leave the Bugs Be
(Are They Really Hurting Anything?)
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Finding pests or pest damage in your yard? Sure, they may be leaving dead, brown spots all over the yard from eating on grass roots, but is that so bad? When left alone, your dead lawn can likely be rolled up almost like a carpet due to the roots having been eaten. How cool is that? Infestations are totally reasonable and nothing to worry about fixing. Maybe you’ll be lucky and have an entire variety of pests! After all, you are not doing anything to prevent them, right? That is practically an invitation. Best of luck hosting the Bug Ball in your lawn–you are their hero!
Use Fast-Release Chemical Fertilizers
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Fast-release chemical fertilizers absolutely won’t burn your grass to death. Use starter fertilizer with weed control over that new grass seed. It won’t allow the seeds to germinate and leave a perfectly dead yard. That’s the goal, isn’t it? Circling back to weed killer, kill your lawn in tandem with fast-release chemical fertilizers by using pre-emergent killer. This can potentially prevent grass growth for an entire season or longer! Double the destruction power!
There are many opportunities to destroy your lawn this season. Make sure you take advantage of them all and produce a truly horrific yard. Certainly this will make the neighbors come knocking to congratulate you on your successful decimation of curb appeal and neighborhood value!
PS: Make sure you check out our spring cleanup checklist, and our list of spring cleanup tools!
Spring is near! NVS Landscapes offers a number of Landscaping Services in Albany. Contact us using the form below if you’re interested in a quote, or give us a call:
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